Commanded and Conquered Commercial Shorts

[Masked Shah 5]

Jarmen Kell and Jadeon rummage through a disabled tank looking for parts

 

Jadeon- I do not understand hasten response to jump to war... I mean...

 

Jarmen Kell- Jade, remember the war of 1812, US president Madison hasty decision to jump to war... The English was about to give them anything they wanted, but he still chosen to go to war... and America was almost defeated.... People will learn from mistakes, and perhaps society will stop viewing us a underachieved crazied lunatic society, and accept us as we are...

 

Jadeon- Maybe it is as bad as the great Diogenes once said... no good can come of man... And there is no shroud of darkness, because the world itself is pitch black...

 

Jarmen k- Now now Jade, with a moment to ponder the true implications to understand whether man is either a creature good or evil hinders the fact you yourself must strive to become a better person...

 

Jadeon- Maybe your right.... as always...

 

Jarmen K- Now, help me hotwire this bitch... so we can steal it...

 

COMMANDED AND CONQUERED

coming soon...

[Guest MadBadger]

Coming soon? Comming Soon? BETA BE COMING VERY SOON OR ILL ROLL OVER YOU IN 50 NUKE OVERLORDS

 

errr p.s i loved it

[Masked Shah 5]

Kane enters oval office with President Bush, Condalisa Rice, Karl Rove, and Donald Rumsfield

 

Kane- Well gentlemen, Have you decided on the anti missle defense package?

 

Bush- Well um, *confused crossed eye look* It's for the good of Amerka (America). I have given much thought... but the price... well...

 

Rumsfield- Well, what the president is saying is, it's kinda not so reasonable...

 

Rice- Who'da hell you think ya'are... coming in here with your bald whiteass asking for nukes...? Nah Ahh We ain't playin that... *puts hands on hips* Why are you looking at me like that... I ain't being cute.

 

Kane- *Clears throat* Well, I see you don't feel like the defense your country is a priority. Well, with the deadline you had promised congress, it looks like you won't make it...

*clean teeth with tooth pick* They may even call you back to the office from your vaction... that's a shame...

 

Kane begins to slowly walk away

 

Bush- M-m-m-my vacation?....

 

Kane- Yup, well I got buyer in North Korea who are interested in this...

 

Kane proceeds slowly to door

 

Bush- N-n-n-north K-k-Korea? Condi, isn't that one of the axis of evil places?

 

Rice shakes head, and rolls her eyes...

 

Bush- Wait...!!!

 

Kane- One nuke per anti-missile package!!!

 

Bush- I'll Take Two *holds up three fingers*

 

COMMANDED AND CONQUERED SERIES

Comming soon...

[Guest MadBadger]

Well um, *confused crossed eye look* It's for the good of Amerka

 

I'll Take Two *holds up three fingers*

 

[Cygnus X-1 12]

dude......hahaha...that was good. Keep it up

 

hmm.....maybe you could get King or Sonic to put thses up on the main page, or at least link to them

[Masked Shah 5]

Smashing Pumkin's "Beginning of the End" plays in background, as tunnel opens up in US base. Shadows of soldiers run back and forth doing some kind of havoc... General Granger hearing the noise comes running out with shotgun....

 

General Granger- What the Hell!!!??

 

Fires several rounds into air, the shadowy figures run back into hole. The outside lights come back online.... as soliders awake from their bunks and run outside

 

Soldier 1- What the...

 

They see the base has been egged and silly stringed.... With spray painted words on walls "Mohammed Wuz Hear".

 

Soldier 2- Now that just doesn't make sense....

 

Granger reaches down to taste jelly from broken jar.

 

General Granger- Rasberry... Only one man would dare give me the Rasberry.....

MAAAAAAASKED SHAAAAAAAAH!!!

 

COMMANDED AND CONQUERED

Coming soon...

[Guest MadBadger]

U = FOOKIN SPOOKY HOW THE FOOK YOU THINK THIS STUFF UP?

[Masked Shah 5]

Masked Shah appear on giant Screen in UN Building as several representatives from various countries look on...

 

Masked Shah- *Lookin at side* Is thing on?.... Oh it is? Ok... *clears throat* BEHOLD!!! I AM THE MASKED SHAH OF SHODIRKADIRKA!!!! YOU WILL PULL YOUR FORCES FROM MY COUNTRY OR ELSE!!!

 

General Alexander- *chuckling* Or else what Shah? *whispering to Townes* I gotta see this...

 

Masked Shah- I HAVE A HOSTAGE!!! AN IMPORTANT ONE!!!... um... what your name again?

 

Erik Yeo- Erik Yeo, man.... Oh cool a TV!!!... HI PEOPLE!!!!

 

Masked Shah- You heard him, Erik Yeo... Very famous, if you value his life you will do as I say *smug look*

 

Whole room is quiet...

 

General Alexander- All fine and dandy, but we got real work to do... Mr. Shah... I suggest you... um... stop calling us, we're really busy... bye.

 

Screen shuts off, as whole UN conferance room bursts out laughing

 

Masked Shah- I thought you said you were famous....

 

Erik Yeo- Dude I am... Heeeey guy, you got chips or beer... I got the muchies bad... Good hasheeh bro....

 

COMMANDED AND CONQUERED

Coming soon...

 

And if you dont know who Erik Yeo is... DEATH TO YOU MANY TIMES!!!

[Doctor Destiny 41]

General Granger- Rasberry... Only one man would dare give me the Rasberry..... MAAAAAAASKED SHAAAAAAAAH!!!

Way to rip quotes from movies.

[Luk3us 63]

I'll read em durning my classes tomorrow.

[Doctor Destiny 41]

I'll read em durning my classes tomorrow.

Cause, you know, school is so for f**king around.

[Masked Shah 5]

General Granger- Rasberry... Only one man would dare give me the Rasberry..... MAAAAAAASKED SHAAAAAAAAH!!!

Way to rip quotes from movies.

 

Did it on purpose...

 

It was going to be originally this:

General Granger- Rasberry... Only one man would dare give me the Rasberry.....

 

Soldier 1- Lone Star???

 

General Granger- LOOOOONE STAAAAR!!!

 

But then I was afraid people wouldn't get it... people have seen the movie, but might forget that part... so I redid it the other way...

 

Good job calling, I didn't think anyone would remember the movie.

 

Oh yes Granger is slightly unhinged....

[Cygnus X-1 12]

How could anyone possible forget Spaceballs ??

 

Hmm......did they ever make a Spaceballs 2: The Search for More Money

 

???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????//

 

Cause, y'know, Yogurt said they would :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

[Masked Shah 5]

Oh yes, I forgot that one... LOL

 

I wish I could do MOD for my general idea...

http://forums.cncnz.com/viewtopic.php?p=42...ighlight=#42272

I thought it was funny...

[Luk3us 63]

Spaceballs = Awesome!

 

I'll read em durning my classes tomorrow.

Cause, you know, school is so for f**king around.

 

Of course... It doesn't get serious till exam time anyway.

[Masked Shah 5]

School is for **ssies

 

Be a man and work at Mc Donalds...

[Scorpio XIII 0]

IM from Bush to Dick :Nuklear Weaponzor omfgz!!1!111 Lets go surch WMDs on the internets, USE GOOGLE! Anyways great work Masked Shah you have not ceased to amaze me with your stories...

[Masked Shah 5]

LMAO!!!

 

That's funny but Bush doesn't read the newpaper or look at the "internets" because they say bad things about him....

 

I feel bad for the dude... a little... maybe not...

[Scorpio XIII 0]

no it was an IM from Bush to tell Dick Cheney to surch WMDs on the 'internets' and if you feel sorry for bush, ill hate you for life............................................................................

............................................ .......................................or atleast till tomorrow

[Masked Shah 5]

LOL that works too...

[Doctor Destiny 41]

But then I was afraid people wouldn't get it... people have seen the movie, but might forget that part... so I redid it the other way...

 

Good job calling, I didn't think anyone would remember the movie.

I own the movie on DVD... and it's one of the best parody movies ever made... How can I not know it?

[Scorpio XIII 0]

Yeah it is hilarious, but I havent seen it in ages

[Cygnus X-1 12]

Oh yes, I forgot that one... LOL

 

I wish I could do MOD for my general idea...

Funny as Hell mod

I thought it was funny...

 

Dude, that would be an awesome mod for hte game.

[TheBlackOut 7]

LMAO!!!

 

That's funny but Bush doesn't read the newpaper or look at the "internets" because they say bad things about him....

 

I feel bad for the dude... a little... maybe not...

 

Bush- I don't look at the internets because I hear there noddy things on there!

 

Secret Service Guy- *whispers to bush* You're right, there are naked ladies on the internet!

 

*Bush turns on his computer* WTF?! I can't see through it, it says Windows! And I see no naked ladies, I thought internet was on the computer?

 

 

I can get bored too.

[Scorpio XIII 0]

Bush - Im going to have to get Bill gates in here!

*moments later bill gates enters*

Gates - Hello, Mr. President, you wanted to see me?

Bush - Yeah I think your 'Windows' are disfunctional!

Gates -why sir?

Bush - Cant see through 'em!!!

Gates - they arent actual 'Windows' its a program

*Bush gives Gates a cluless, idiotic look*

Bush - WTF did you just say?!

Gates - Nevermind, keep trying to look through the 'Windows'

*Gates slowly waks away*

Gates murmurs - W H A T A D U M B @ & %